Tribalism in Nigerian Marriages

"I don't understand,so you can't get married because the both of you are not from the same tribe?"

I nodded.
"Does it matter?she asked frowning a little."
"Yes I replied."as I resumed crying

Such is the dilemma faced by youths of today. Tribalism has become a condition for marriage. Parents tell their children who they should and should not get married to. Tribalism, even among the same tribe, occurs too but it won't be a major topic of discuss. It is so bad that even educated parents are also ambassadors of this wrong notion. It's pretty appalling and disheartening that we are not saying anything about it. We all want to respect our parents' decision, even if it would mean spending the rest of your life with someone you do not like. Tribalism has been a fate handed down to us by our ancestors.

Friendship which is one of the ingredients of a good marriage is omitted and problems arise- which is why we have a lot of failed marriages today. Instead of getting married to someone you love, you marry a stranger you do not know and love, simply because you're from the same tribe. Questions like: Is he/she decent? Is he/she hardworking? Is he/she financially stable etc are avoided and Tribalism becomes the perfect reference. Finally,I can't find the rationality behind the issue of Tribalism. Just because I am Igbo, it doesn't mean I can't marry a Yoruba person. Let us change that mindset and let love lead.

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